There is a myth that guys and girls cannot be friends - in
some cases, that may be true. However, I
have ALWAYS had a core group of guy friends. Typically, they are easier
going and seem to possess a bit more emotional stability than "many" females. My male compadres tend
to be as averse to drama as I…which is a HUGE BONUS. Fortunately, there are a handful of great
guys I can honestly say I love as a brother. Because of their presence in my life, a steady sweet protective
spirit, and an air of authenticity (and fun) enriches my life.
One “brother” has been around over 2 ½ decades…and is one of my longest lasting, most meaningful friendships. Over the last 2 ½ decades, he has changed tires; rescued me when my mustang was stuck on ice; moved me and my daughter from one apartment to another, and so forth. More than anything, he’s been there for me on days I couldn’t stop crying…and yes, he’s been there on days I’ve struggled with dating dilemmas - decades ago, and now again as I find myself navigating single life.
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| The oldest digital pic I could find...There are many "prints" in boxes that I really need to scan...some priceless ones! |
Between us, we’ve weathered 3 marriages, several wounds, loss, disappointments, and lots of “life stuff” – the good and the bad. D is a friend that I can talk about absolutely ANYTHING with …and believe me, we do cover it all. Having experienced several unique parallel struggles, we are clothed in similar scars – both emotional and physical. (We are quite literally “titanium friends” …having matching scars on our right arms!)
We can and do - debate any topic. There is agreement on most big issues, but not on all. He does challenge my thinking at times... which is a good thing. A friendship of this caliber allows freedom to be transparent without judgment.
Nowadays, a huge plus is his ability to speak openly as I navigate single life… and ugh – slightly dip the proverbial toe in to the “dating world” (the very thing I said I’d never do again...and I’m not completely convinced it’s for me.) D’s insights into the complex male psyche are priceless and he seems to know a bit about the female psyche as well… it’s scary, at times.
Because of our history – up until now, he has known – (or in one case, he met) every guy I’ve ever dated. I can honestly not say that of any other friend or family member. Years ago, we lived in the same apartment complex and ran in the same circles. Those were fun times... and it probably never dawned on me that this guy would still be in my life 25 years later. Thankfully, he is. (funny side note: the first time I met my ex was actually because of D.... I've jokingly given him a hard time about it… all in fun, of course. It’s really just another thread woven in the tapestry of a long friendship.)
Lunches and dinner "updates" are usually full of laughter, and on occasion, tears. (Often, my tears end and laughter ensues because he has the ability to lighten the mood.) Regardless of the conversation, I always leave with a smile on my face, a giant bear hug, and increasing gratitude for this guy. He tells it like it is… without being offensive or condemning. I need that in my life. We all do!
So, for today’s entry in the Gratitude Journal:
I’m beyond grateful for this enduring friendship, and for the fact that he texted to see if I was available for lunch. Lunch turned in to a movie and of course, throughout the few hours we hung out, there was much meaningful dialogue with my forever friend. What a gift he is to me.
Yes, guys and girls can be friends…and treasured friends at that.
PS – “D” doesn’t like having anyone make a big deal about him, so if you happen to read this …and you actually know him, then “shhhhhh” don’t say a word!
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