"What Brown Did for Me"

There are three favorite spots in our home for reading, writing and thinking.  One of those is our living room.  It’s easiest to allow my mind the freedom to reflect and sometimes wander while comfortably reclining on the Waverly Rose covered, overstuffed furniture – against the backdrop of artichoke stained walls.  This is a very feminine room…quiet and tranquil.  Any time I enter the living room for personal study, two very sweet calico kittens follow.  They seem to complete the atmosphere as they snuggle on the ottoman next to my feet.   Friday evening was the perfect time for me to relax in the living room for a bit.

It was the conclusion to another full week – not unlike most, a week of meetings, appointments and even a couple of fun outings with friends.  He had traveled and much had been going on,  WGH and I wanted nothing more than to stay home and just chill out.  (Now that I’ve come to appreciate the act of “resting”, those low-key, pajama clad nights at home are my favorite!)  Friday evening I settled into the living room as WGH continued working in his upstairs office.  Once his day was through – he joined me, seated across the room, facing me as we talked about the happenings of recent days. 

After a few minutes of conversing, our doorbell rang – and WGH opened the door to find our UPS man.  It was a late evening delivery of a UPS Express Envelope.  WGH sat back down across from me with the parcel in hand and I asked the usual questions:  “what is it?”   “who is it from?”   His response was “why do I think I’m not going to like what’s in this envelope?”   It’s an understandable sentiment – the company he has been employed by for four years is in Chapter 11.  The company is cutting expenses, and when companies cut expenses – they tend to cut workforce.  Ugh.

As he stared at the envelope with the vague Sender info, my mind catapulted in several directions: “

•  Hmmm…  Friday evenings are notoriously famous for pink slips. 
• Maybe I should grab it from him and hide it until Monday so we can still enjoy a restful weekend?
• Okay, I know that we’ve maintained a certain peace about this whole “job security” thing …but admittedly, on the verge of opening this letter, that peace quickly left me.”
•  I took a deep breath as he opened what was certain to change the course of our night, this weekend – and the coming weeks and months. 
• In a pathetic attempt at humor, I suggested that maybe it was a membership into the “jelly of the month club”. 
• I stared and waited for what seemed like forever as he pulled the tab and removed a regular sized envelope.  GULP.  “Here we go.” 

After a long pause, he revealed the contents of the letter.  Our weekend was not in danger after all – and the next few days at least, would go as we had planned.  After getting my heart rate up for the   big reveal, we went to the gym before settling into a fireside movie.  While on the treadmill, I kept thinking about how easy it is to “say” you have peace about something – but how disciplined one must actually be to fully experience and enjoy that peace.  I was disappointed in myself for allowing my mind to venture to the worst case scenario – rather than peacefully trusting and accepting what was to come next. 

A couple of questions came to mind while reviewing the UPS delivery on the treadmill: 

1. My heart rate was actually higher sitting in the living room 30 minutes before getting to the gym – why did I allow myself to get so anxious – and so quickly?
2. How many times have I wanted to delay “opening” what was handed to me out of fear or the inability to control a situation?  Am I more short-sighted now than before?
3. Have I missed something wonderful at times because I “refused delivery”?

Of course, I was also reminded of many times that something was brought to the doorstep of my life that I really didn’t want, but had to accept it anyway.  Some of those very situations have been the greatest blessings of all.  You hear stories like this all the time – you break a bone (not what you wanted), but a lifesaving diagnosis resulted; You get a blister and stop for a band-aid making you late for work (not desirable) – then miss being killed when a plane purposefully flies into your building; Your spouse leaves you for another person (never desirable) – but you ultimately marry your best friend and find out what it means to be truly loved.  Everyone has stories like this – there are several in my own life, and in the lives of close family and friends.  Had my worst fears become reality – life wouldn’t have stopped and somehow the situation would’ve been redeemed. 

We still enjoyed a relaxing weekend, complete with a vivid reminder that God is always at work, teaching and shaping us in ways and for reasons beyond us.  He often does it with a sense of humor. 

That UPS letter that caused my heart to momentarily race?  It was a new AMEX card. 


 "do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."  (Phil 4:6-7)

  "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope."  (Jer 29:11)

Whitney Houston and the Greatest Love of All

It took only minutes after learning of her passing that I heard, “No grief for a dope”; “Whitney Houston, who?”; “She deserved it”; “She wanted it”; “Serves her right!”  WOW - Our culture has become so insensitive.   Am I the ONLY person who perceives this way of thinking as severely MESSED UP? 

WGH and I listened to a news report Monday morning that said, “Whitney was found dead in the bathtub – and there were prescription pills found nearby.”   I’m so thankful that my sweet husband is picking up on my unique way of “processing information.”  As I was thinking it, he said it:  “Wow, Tawnda – if you died in our bathtub, the media could say that prescription pills were found nearby.”  EXACTLY!  And should the truth be known, I have a small pharmaceutical company in the master bathroom, all legitimate – all necessary for: various ailments; chronic illnesses; allergies; surgical recovery; and fighting infection.  It’s quite likely I’ll be on at least 4-5 of these as long as I’m alive! 

Could Whitney have been intoxicated or fallen in a drug induced state?  Sure, but I don’t know the reality of the situation….and neither does the general public!  In a strange way, a confirmed, self-medicated state would only make the situation sadder.

In an unexpected twist, my newsfeeds have been full of statuses indicating that the fallen service men and women from our country in the last week have been overshadowed by the attention given to a drugged out pop singer.  It seems some of my Christian and Patriot friends have forgone the values they profess and defend!    While the website and its operators are far from infallible, the United States Department of Defense has reported the following casualties in association with “Operation Enduring Freedom” in the last two weeks: 

USMC Lcpl  Edward Joe Dyers  of Greenville, MS on February 1^st

Army BG Terrance John Hildner, of Fairfax, VA February 3^rd
Army SFC Billy Albert Sutton, Tupelo MI, Feb 13^th

With absolutely ZERO disrespect, two of these young men died prior to the passing of Whitney Houston.  Only one died afterward.  Her death did not OVERSHADOW their heroism.  A large percentage of our population may place emphasis on the life of a fallen pop idol – and another large percentage may place added emphasis on fallen lives, in uniform.  Please understand that I have four friends who have lost sons in Afghanistan in the last 2 years, so this is a matter that is near to my heart. However, I feel confident that all lives are valued and precious in the eyes of our Lord.  Who are we to determine otherwise?

Ironically, it seems many feel compelled to elevate Tebow and/or the Super Bowl to heights far above the oft discounted life of Whitney Houston….In fact, according to twitterstats.net, the last 24 hours have generated 1478 tweets with the hash tag #whitneyhouston.  Interestingly, 1482 tweets were generated with the hash tag #timtebow.  Even more interesting?  The #Superbowl hash tag generated over TEN THOUSAND tweets per second during the February 5^th game (per readwriteweb.com.)   I’ve intentionally searched and cannot find A SINGLE PERSON who has suggested that the 2012 Super Bowl overshadowed a single “Operation Enduring Freedom” casualty.  What’s wrong with this picture?  Do I understand that it’s okay to exponentially elevate one single sporting event – with no life lost, but with incredible commercial value - over a single combat casualty?  REALLY?  If I’m off track, PLEASE help me to see my inaccuracy – help ME to see that one life is of less value than another. 

With humble sincerity, I commit to praying for the families of our fallen war heroes.  I also commit to praying for the daughter, mother and extended family of Whitney – a troubled soul, but one valued by the King of Kings.  Who are we to judge?  Is my life a life that’s “white as snow, apart from the saving grace of Jesus?” ABSOLUTELY NOT.  Is yours?   Aren’t you glad that your life is not fodder for gossip in the supermarket checkout?Top of Form

On Sunday evening, roughly 24 hours after learning of Whitney Houston’s death, and after being appalled by the  general judgmental commentary, I posted the following Facebook status: 

Who are we to judge? I only hope that when I die, others will be quick to remember the good that came from my life...and slower still to recall my poor choices. No matter what you thought of Whitney Houston, she was a mother, daughter and friend. She was a beautiful, talented, child of God - and not unlike the rest of us, she battled demons too, hers were just made public.

Instead of condemning a life that’s gone from Earth – why not pray for the ones she left behind?

~~~~~

In the spirit of full disclosure, I cannot close this post without addressing the latest controversy.  I heard this morning that NJ Governor, Chris Christie has ordered the American flag to fly at half-mast on Saturday during Whitney’s funeral.  Well, IMHO – that should be a tribute reserved for the fallen service men and women of each state, as well as national and state governmental leaders.  Personally, if this is the honor given on Saturday – I feel a dangerous precedent is set.  In months and years to come, will the family and fan base of SnoopDog, Clay Aiken, Taylor Swift and Sir Mix-a-Lot demand equal treatment?  Wow, who will make that divisive, subjective decision? (No disprespect to any of these artists, of course!)

Before you respond harshly to my viewpoints - allow me to tell you why I DID NOT post anything about the Super Bowl. My precious son, a United States Marine – returned from a 10 ½ month deployment in the Middle East.  At this moment, without a Google search, I couldn’t begin to tell you who won the Super Bowl, let alone who played.  All that mattered to me on February 5^th, 2012 is that I was able to hug my “baby boy’s” neck. 

Top of FEphesians 4:29

“Judge not, that you be not judged. For with the judgment you pronounce you will be judged, and with the measure you use it will be measured to you. Why do you see the speck that is in your brother's eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when there is the log in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother's eye. (Matt 7:1-5)

Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.  (Eph 4:29)

I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak, for by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.” (Matt 12:36-37)